Top 22 Tantric Masturbation Techniques For Sacred Solo Sex

You've heard of the powers of tantric sex. But what of tantric masturbation, aka conscious masturbation?

Self-stimulation is an act with shame firmly stamped all over it.

So, can solo tantric sex play enhance your sex life?

Or is sex only powerful and meaningful when done in union with others?

As a tantra educator teaching thousands about the art of Tantra, I've been asked this question many times. Read on to learn precisely what tantric masturbation is and how it awakens your sexual self.

"Tantric masturbation is a healthy way to cultivate self-love and sexual energy." - Steffo Shambo

What is a tantric masturbation practice and tantric solo sex?

Tantric masturbation removes all shame, sleaziness, and soullessness from masturbation. It is a spiritual encounter with the Self.

Masturbation is often regarded as the last resort, only turned to when there's no one but yourself with which to get hot and sweaty.

The truth is that Tantric masturbation is beneficial not only for those looking for love. In reality, people in relationships have much to gain from regular self-pleasure experiences.

It comes down to being more mindful in the bedroom. It's time to feel into the more subtle energies. To tap into the intimate, deep connection that only amplifies during sex.

What are the benefits of tantric masturbation?

Tantric solo sex practice is not some secret occult power or a fancy name given to self-pleasure. Instead, it is a gateway to sexual healing for many people. Tantric masturbation helps individuals improve their sex lives by reducing and reversing sexual shame, sexual numbness, and sex addiction. Through self-love and tantric practices, people can intimately know their bodies, better communicate their sexual needs in relationships, and become more adept at diving into deep, passionate connections with others.

Far from being a mystical concept, tantric masturbation is a practical approach to self-exploration, self-acceptance, and enhancing one's overall sexual well-being. It empowers individuals to embrace their sexuality, overcome negative patterns, and cultivate a more fulfilling and connected intimate life.

Tantric masturbation can help to create many benefits in your life, including:

• Increased self-care and self-love, which enhances inner peace.
• Healing body shame and sexual shame.
• Increase sexual polarity in a relationship.
• Accepting your intimate parts as they are.
• More refined spiritual orgasms.
• Transforming sexual energy to spiritual growth (a.k.a. sex magic ritual).
• Increases the ability to achieve orgasm and multiple releases.
• Foundation to experience energy orgasm.
• Higher levels of self-compassion.
• Helps men drop into their natural masculine energy, and women to their feminine energy.
• Strengthens personal sexual identity.

The famous writer and philosopher Alan Watts once talked about the spiritual benefits of masturbation and sex:

"Over the years, it has become my firm opinion that sexual activity, even if only through masturbation, is requisite and necessary, as well for the body for the soul, for men and women alike. It stimulates your glands, exercises your pelvis, thrills your nerves, brings mind and body together as one, and culminates in an ecstasy in which there is neither past nor future, no separation between self and other, We need this as we need vitamin, proteins, water, and air."

What’s the difference between normal masturbation and tantric masturbation?

Standard masturbation feels worlds apart from the embodied bliss that is tantric masturbation.

A regular masturbation session is focused on one thing and one thing alone: getting off.

While some benefits might come with standard masturbation:

• Releasing steam.
• Relieving stress, anxiety and depression.
• Aiding sleep.
• Strengthens the pelvic floor.
• Ejaculation (loss?).
• And physical health benefits from released feeling-good hormones.

There are also numerous studies on the benefits of masturbation. According to one study from the Cleveland Clinic of married people assigned female at birth (AFAB), those who masturbated reported higher levels of orgasms, self-esteem, and sexual desire (libido), as well as greater satisfaction with their marriage and sex life.

However, tantric philosophy reveals how it drains your energy and takes away your full life force and power. So, substituting regular masturbation with tantric masturbation should be a top priority. Essentially, with regular peak orgasms, you’re draining energy.

For women, this common masturbation involves a localized orgasm, with rarely any connection to the entire body.

For men, too frequent mindless quick releases can even be hurtful to a man's confidence, zest, and manifestation power in the long run.

The Tantric principles revolve around embodiment. In Tantra, we remove goals and therapeutically work with sexual energy in the body. Genitals are not the only focal point—secondary erogenous zones are also explored.

Thus, men delve into male seed retention, which is a crucial part of tantric masturbation with so many benefits. Meanwhile, both sexes can experience different types of orgasm. And not just the explosive orgasm that many think is the only kind!

Tantra masturbation also steers away from overstimulating adult toys. Many who experience conscious masturbation can't believe the level of expansiveness and liberation.

How to practice tantric mastubation? Step-by-step

My 12 best steps for practicing tantric masturbation consciously:

1. Set the scene

It's just you in the room, which means that every effort you make is to maximize your pleasure. Put on relaxing music and light sensually scented candles. Anything that shifts your mind and body into a state of receptiveness.

2. Create a sacred self ceremony

To practice Tantra is to practice intense awareness. What do you want out of the self-love session? Set your intention and do a short meditation where you visualize a protective golden bubble around you.

3. Make it playful

When masturbation is playful, it becomes an opportunity for self-discovery and experimentation. It encourages a more open, celebratory, and joyful relationship with one's sexuality. Individuals can explore different sensations, techniques, and fantasies in a relaxed and enjoyable way, leading to a better understanding of their desires and preferences.

Try incorporating new masturbation positions, locations, movements, dance, create art with sexual fluids, explore erotic literature, explore different textures and materials, and approach your body with curiosity, reverence, and mindfulness.

4. Be mindful of shame  

Begin to uncover and heal masturbation shame. It can show up as thoughts and feelings of guilt, like:

• "What am I doing?"
• "I shouldn't be doing this right now."
• "I have better things to do."
• "I am wasting my time."
• "I am not doing it right."

When you catch those limiting beliefs, reassure yourself with positive affirmations like:

• "I am loved and good enough."
• "My sexuality is natural and sacred."
• "I love my body."

And then continue pleasuring yourself while feeling the good, the bad, and the ugly.

5. Breath and body connection

Use the breath and body to slow the mind. Many people find tantric sex out of a desire not to feel sexually numb anymore. Slow down the breath and draw your awareness deep into every sensation. This will synchronize your breath with your body and mind, creating a more conscious way of breathing.

6. Move out of fantasy

Fantasy can be pure inhibited joy and sensual creativity in pleasurable sex. Yet, tantric practices focus on the experience of sex in the present moment. Body awareness in tantric masturbation can take time. Breathwork and creative touch keep you alive for your sexual pleasure.

7. Add a mirror

Incorporating a mirror during solo pleasure can create a surprising level of intimacy and vulnerability. For many women, it may be the first time they have closely observed their yoni in detail.

In my workshops and tantra retreats, I've witnessed numerous students sharing that self-stimulation in front of a mirror has led to tears and healing as men and women confront and embrace their bodies in a profoundly intimate way. While initially daunting for some, this visual element can be a powerful tool for self-exploration, acceptance, and reclaiming one's sexuality.

8. Sounding

Try chanting OOOOOMMMM while masturbating.

Sounding, or making vocal tones and vibrations, directly stimulates the vagus nerve, which runs from the brain stem through the chest and abdomen, innervating the genital region. The vibrations reverberate down to the pelvic floor, increasing arousal and sensitivity.

Additionally, sounding opens the throat chakra, promoting vulnerability and sensual expression, while stimulating the heart chakra to foster intimacy. By engaging the mind, body, and spirit through vocalization, sounding unlocks profound levels of sexual pleasure by activating the vagus nerve's connection to the genitals.

9. Be truly conscious of sensations

Tantric sex play takes the pressure off so you can focus on different sensations. Play with various types of touch, such as soft, firm, light fingertips, sensual, and nails. Notice how you feel and respond to each other differently.

10. Move energy up the chakras

What makes tantric masturbation so pleasurable is the practice of sublimation. That means you stimulate yourself until a high state of excitement and then pull that energy up the chakras along the spine.

This is a revolution for lovers — get to know the body’s energy centers, and you’ve got a treasure map of never-ending pleasure at your disposal.

Note: The articles on swadisthana chakra and the chakras are great places to start!

11. Remove the finish line

Orgasm isn't the end goal. Suppose you go into your conscious masturbation practice without the goal of orgasm but instead just to enjoy and explore. If orgasm happens, that's fine, but it's more of a bonus than a checking off-the-list thing. This makes the whole experience more playful and nuanced.

Note: This idea of non-goal-oriented sex is also a very potent sex therapy method for couples.

12. Rest in the resolution

The standard sexual resolution: It can be energetically draining due to the significant hormonal shifts; the release of hormones like oxytocin and prolactin, coupled with the depletion of testosterone in men, promotes relaxation and sleepiness.

The tantric sexual resolution: In tantric sex practices, the resolution phase looks quite different from conventional sex. Men learn to separate orgasm from ejaculation, allowing them to experience prolonged pleasure without the typical post-orgasmic resolution. Similarly, women are encouraged to move beyond the goal of explosive orgasms and instead cultivate a sustained state of ecstatic energy flow.

As a result, after tantric masturbation, both men and women often feel energized, vibrant, and deeply satisfied rather than experiencing the typical post-coital lethargy.

Those who regularly engage in tantric practices tend to radiate a positive, glowing aura in their daily lives as if they're perpetually basking in the afterglow of profound sexual and spiritual fulfillment. This sustained state of blissful energy is a remarkable consequence of embracing tantric principles and transcending conventional approaches to sexual expression. 🤩

How to perform mutual tantric masturbation

Practicing mutual masturbation will deepen the trust and understanding between a couple. It can help to get to know each other's sexual likes and dislikes and aid in spiritualizing your relationship. Watching your partner pleasure themselves is a vulnerable healing practice. If you haven't tried it before, here are four positions to get it on and drive each other to the edge.

1. Lap lovemaking: One partner sits comfortably on the bed while the other sits on their lap. The person on top leaves just enough space for their lover to reach down and pleasure themselves. Feel each other's breath speed up and that sexy heat build.
2. Cow-girl: Men are visual creatures. This is a surprise to no one. The woman pleases herself with her ass, back wreathing in satisfaction. This will send sexual energy surging through her partner's entire body.
3. Straddle: Both partners sit on their heels, facing each other. Feel free to place pillows between your legs for comfort (and more sensation for the ladies!). Tease each other with your eyes, body, and arousal.
4. Taking turns: One partner lies on the bed and starts self-pleasing while the other sits beside the bed, watching in a meditative state. Then, they swap turns.

5 male masturbation techniques

During a male tantric masturbation session, the most significant piece of advice is to slow down and not use pornography; this maximizes the potential for sexual self-discovery.

Here's a quote from a student in my mentorship program who had a breakthrough in his tantric masturbation practice:

Other than that, here’s how to navigate a more powerful experience.

1. Explore your entire body

When most men masturbate, they go straight to a quick release. Yet, the ancient spiritual practice of Tantra has other ideas. They lead to heightened spiritual clarity, more powerful orgasms, and a more sensual life.

Move away from the lingam (Sankskit for penis) and spend time with your secondary erogenous zones:

• Enjoy pleasuring your nipples — yes, they are erogenous zones for men too!
• Stroke along the lips, neck, abdomen, inner thighs, and inner groin. Make touching your body a spiritual experience!
• The abdomen — particularly the line from the nipples down to the pelvis. Play with this area brings a surge of primal pleasure.

2. Use your non-dominant hand

Your non-dominant hand doesn't just feel novel as it's less dextrous. This makes for a slower rhythm and pressure, so you can enjoy stoking your sexual fires gradually. This approach also helps if you've become numb through sensation. However, if this is your main issue, it's worth checking out the NoFap method.

3. Try some new tantric masturbation techniques

Try some techniques we've explored in my lingam massage article, all of which are suitable for solo masturbation. With these, you can learn to direct life-force energy through the whole body.

Here is a video for different lingam massage techniques you could incorporate into your masturbation practice:

4. Play with edging

Once you feel an orgasm coming during a conscious masturbation session, cool the experience. Feel how your body relaxes and channels the sacred swadisthana energy from the balls up to the crown of the head. Edging is the secret to mastering your sexual energy and not becoming a slave to it.

5. Testicle play

Testicle massage is a holistic and ancient practice that harnesses life-force energy. It can tackle many male health issues and help increase low libido.

The primary erogenous zones for men include both the lingam and the balls. Some techniques to experience pleasure on a whole new scale include:

• Focus on the seam at the center of the testes.
• Cupping them.
• Tapping the perineum.
• Drawing your testes away from your lingam.
• Breathing down to your male center.

Use this time to honor your testes and their sacred intimate prowess.

5 female masturbation techniques

Here are some tools for your self-love kit if you’re seeking more than just an orgasmic release. A profoundly blissful experience awaits!

1. Reframe masturbation

Far from "a quick release," practicing tantric masturbation amplifies your own pleasure. Move from the pressure of achieving orgasm to experiencing bliss and incredible self-awareness. Unfortunately, my female clients have more shame to untangle around masturbation than men. So please take it in stages to reclaim your pleasure.

2. Breast massage

Women (and men) have the ability to have an orgasm just through nipple stimulation. Breasts are magnificent regions for sexual activation, too often overlooked during masturbation.

3. Explore different techniques

You might find yourself in auto-pilot mode during self-pleasure. You know the quickest way to orgasm, but the problem is this removes the chance for play and exploration. Yoni massage article, try diagonal strokes around the clit, or even tapping your clitoral hood.

4. REMOVE the pressure to reach the big O

Removing the goal of the big O and separating orgasm from Tantric masturbation elevates your capacity for pleasure. Each flicker of sensation, each wave of delicious tension and release is to be savored. Reaching the big O, particularly under time constraints, undermines what you can experience sexually.

5. Explore your relationship with adult toys

Toys can be highly liberating and empowering for some women, allowing them to intensify their sexual experience. However, it's important to find a balance, as overusing toys or relying too heavily on clitorial stimulation can numb subtle sensations and make achieving pleasure with a partner more difficult.

When incorporating toys into a tantric practice, develop a healthy relationship with them – one that enhances and frees your sexuality without becoming a hindrance. The key is to find a balanced approach that works for your overall sex life and intimacy with your partner.

Note: I highly advise against women using any vibrational toys due to desensitization and numbing, which has the opposite effect than what we try to achieve in tantric masturbation.

Conclusion

So, we've uncovered one of the most hidden, underdocumented aspects of tantric sex: tantric masturbation.

The benefits of tantric masturbation go far beyond a temporary mood boost or stress reliever in your free time.

Tantric masturbation is an immeasurably healing practice. But to transform your sex life — you need the wisdom teachings. And for that, you need an experienced teacher who can guide you to becoming a high-caliber man.

Suppose you want to take your self-love to the next level. You want to be an incredible partner adept in the subtleties of tantric sex. In that case, here's your free training to expand personally, spiritually, and sexually.

Tantric Masturbation FAQ