Tantric Lingam Massage Guide: Top 17 Erotic Penis Techniques

Steffo Shambo

Updated on Aug 11, 2023
lingam massage

Want to supercharge your relationship with your man? Then, blow whatever he knows about pleasure out of the water with an earth-shattering lingam massage.

This blend of neo-tantric massage and modern sexology is the KEY to a deeply healing and sexual experience for you both.

Men have so much to gain from this sacred penis massage! Finally, they can fully surrender and receive, and you get to be the seductive pleasure master for the session.

So, let’s turn all that you know about true intimacy on its head by learning the techniques and rituals of the divine, sexy lingam massage.

First let’s take a quick look at the top 16 lingam massage techniques video, and then continue with the guide:

What is a lingam massage?

Lingam is a Sanskrit word for “wand of light.” It’s a conscious penis massage, not from classical tantra, as many think, but neo-tantra.

Lingam massage was developed by Joseph Kramer, founder of Sexological Bodywork. He drew on the principles of neo-tantra, which is the modern western approach to ancient Tantric philosophies.

A lingam massage combines elements of therapeutic massage, yoga, bioenergetics, and sexual therapy.

Contrary to penis massage or erotic massage, lingam massages work on three different levels:

  1. Pleasure
  2. Healing
  3. Connection

It supports lingam owners to direct their pleasure intentionally and harmoniously. In addition, it offers a way to acknowledge and focus on male sexuality through body touch.

What is the difference between a lingam massage and a penis massage?

woman holding a cucumber with milk dripping

Lingam massage focus on healing and sexual therapy. Whereas a penis massage, or dick massage, focuses purely on sexualized pleasure and having a good time. And there’s nothing wrong with this!

Lingam massage is not focused on the climax. Instead, ejaculation control is adhered to both by the giver and receiver. While in a sensual penis massage, the climax, the release, and the happy ending is the goal.

Many men could greatly benefit from a lingam massage since they tend to have difficulty surrendering and receiving. But, again, this goes back to society’s pressure on men to consistently perform and be the leader.

And this weight doesn’t suddenly vanish when you step into the bedroom. The opportunity to fully release during a full-length lingam massage is a powerful therapeutic agent. It can be an incredibly healing experience.

On a personal note, I have healed many emotional and sexual blockages through this practice, and I am always surprised that tears come up during the session.

What are the benefits of a lingam massage?

Men who receive a lingam massage can become more sensitive and attuned to the ocean of pleasure many couldn’t even dream about.

This life-changing penis massage can lead to:

  1. A doorway for accessing multiple orgasms.
  2. A deeper connection to his spiritual and sexual self.
  3. Healing — releases blockages from old traumas, even on a cellular level.
  4. Improves blood circulation — according to research, a lack of blood circulation to the penis causes impotence in around 70% of men!
  5. Managing erection problems and erectile dysfunction.
  6. Improving reproductive function — and naturally increasing blood flow to the penis.
  7. Leads to better genital health.
  8. Strengthens weak erections.
  9. Relieves stress.
  10. Widens blood vessels — a regular penis massage can open the blood vessels, which helps to increase blood circulation to the genital area.
  11. Forges incredible intimacy between partners.
  12. Increased sensation — a penis or dick massage helps produce penile vibratory stimulation, which makes the penis even more receptive to pleasure.
  13. Improves sexual stamina.

How to give a lingam massage?

Here are my 16 steps to give a lingam massage. This amazing pleasure blend is laid out so you can lay your lover out and give him an unforgettable time:

1. Schedule this intimate experience

You mightn’t think setting a time for a penis massage would be beneficial. However, giving the man time to prepare mentally, physically, and emotionally for this sensual lingam massage only heightens the charged sexual energy and full body healing.

So set a calendar date so he can prepare and anticipate this intimate encounter. At least two hours is necessary for the whole experience. Make sure there are no stressful appointments before or after this neo-tantric massage.

2. Dim the lights

couple in a romantic mood in a tent

If the mood is set, letting go and switching off will be much easier. Turn down the lights, and set up a sacred space so the receiver can benefit fully from the experience.

Make your bedroom a romantic space. Think luxurious bedsheets, pillows, and light candles. Use natural aroma oils that your lovers prefer.

Sexy playlists, feathers to play with sensual pleasure, and a blanket to cover the receiver in case they become cold are also wonderful to have nearby.


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3. Prepping

Before anything else happens, now’s your time to get into the topics of communication and consent. This is a chance to outline certain elements he doesn’t want during the penis massage.

And also, here’s your chance to talk dive into boundaries and preferences with the recipient.

Don’t think of this chat as killing the mood — it leads to a much more pleasurable time.

4. Massage oil benefits penis massages

Natural oils, such as liquid organic coconut oil and cacao oil, are great when selecting a penis oil. And it’s not just for a smooth experience! These natural massage oils benefit penis massages by increasing sex drive and libido.

different kinds of massage oils

So, is coconut oil good for the penis?

Well, according to Healthline, specific foods, including coconut oil, have been suggested to increase testosterone and improve sexual function. Saying that, there is no evidence to suggest that coconut oil can directly increase testosterone or alleviate ED.

If it’s cold outside, let the coconut oil jar sit in warm water for a couple of minutes until liquid.

Another option is to use a silicon-based lube. It stays wet longer but is made from synthetic ingredients.

Either way, avoid using excess oil, as this reduces lingam sensitivity. A little goes a long way!

And finally, this is sensitive skin we’re working with, so it’s essential to massage oil on the penis cautiously, at least at first.

6. Awakening of the senses

naked couple having sex

This is one not to skip!

Sensory awakening gives both of you time to overcome shyness and enter into the raw vulnerability of the tantric lingam massage.

When you remove one of the senses, other senses become enhanced. Try a blindfold, and have a feather and sweet whispering words at the ready. Explore and be creative. This is a time for play!

Another practice is eye-gazing meditation. Sit in front of each other face to face. Gaze lovingly into their eyes, and try to see what’s behind their eye. Deepen into love and connect on a soul level.

7. Full body massage

By now, we’re ready to introduce the full body massage. Warming your partner up into a full-body massage is the best way to bring your partner into an ecstatic and fully open state of being.

In Taoist Tantra, male sexual energy begins at the lingam and spirals outward. We want to create a slow burn and allow the partner to arrive fully in their body.

Invite them to lie on their front in your love nest. Rub the massage oil in your hands, and touch their body. Feel and connect.

woman getting a massage

Start massaging by focusing on the extremities, such as the arms and legs. Then circle into their chest, abdomen, and inner thighs to build intensity.

This is your time to set the pace, so breathe deeper and tune into the receiver’s body.

Explore different strokes using the heel of your hand or a closed fist.

Create a continuous flow as you slowly massage, feeling their entire body relax. Begin gently and build up to a deep, healing massage.

The best advice is to communicate with your partner if you’re in doubt about what feels most delicious for him!

8. How to be an amazing lingam worshipper

The best lingam worshippers are those that enjoy the experience themselves!

Popular culture both demonizes and obsesses over the penis. You’ll see this in the names for this sexual organ — prick, dick, anaconda, even the one-eyed monster!

Penile massages take back the lingam’s divine nature, this light wand.

Sacred worship and devotion help both the receiver and giver become more attuned to their sexuality.

Perhaps, you need to heal your own relationship with the lingam and undo negative associations around the lingam to embrace tantric massages with your whole heart.

Another important note is that it’s not about giving him a hard-on. This, of course, may happen, and if he loses his erection again — that is totally fine! All of the benefits of a lingam massage unfold regardless of whether or not his penis is hard.

9. Appreciate the hard and soft lingam

In a lingam massage, the whole of the penis is worshipped — be it hard or soft.

A myth persists that a soft lingam means the man is not feeling pleasure. Without a doubt, a soft lingam can feel pleasure and orgasm! It’s time to let go of the belief that only a hard lingam means your partner is aroused and feeling bliss from your touch.

The more you not only accept but revere the lingam, in all its states, the more your lover becomes more vulnerable and open. This then feeds back into the pleasure loop, creating ever-heightening sexual fulfillment.

Healing truly starts when a man can feel open enough to receive the massage with a hard or soft lingam.

10. Breath awareness

Breath awareness is one of the key differences between a regular penis massage and a lingam massage. The breath adds a layer of intention beyond just pleasure and opens the wonder and divine energy that lingam massages evoke.

Here are pranayama, breathing techniques, for both partners. The giver can help draw the receiver deeper by focusing on sharing in the breathwork:

Kapalabhati — Breathing in sharply through the mouth on the inhale, pausing, and then taking a slower breath as you exhale. Tilt the pelvis forward as you breathe in, and tuck the pelvis under as you breathe out.

Energy circle — take a deep breath in through the noise strongly. Feel the energy from your pelvis to the crown of your head. Exhale through the mouth and feel prana flood down to the pelvic floor.

The following breath awareness technique is for the man to undertake:

Lingam breath — breathing in, feel sensation on the tip of the lingam to the root. On the exhale, breathe from the root to the tip.

After these breath awareness practices, sense the body, your emotions, and your whole being for a few moments.

11. Learn and communicate the pleasure scale

happy couple hugging

A pleasure scale is a 1-10 scale of the receiver’s arousal. One is a state of comfort and relaxation, and 10 is the state of orgasmic release. This makes 9 the point of no return, meaning they are on the precipice of orgasming and/or ejaculating.

In a sacred penis massage, aka lingham massage, you’re not focusing on reaching higher and higher arousal levels. Instead, the valleys of pleasure are also essential to a penis massage. Communicating using the pleasure scale is useful because it takes minimal effort, keeping the receiver deep in the experience.

12. The art of edging

Here’s how to explore riding the waves of pleasure. This helps with sexual stamina and improves blood circulation, which leads to longer erections:

  1. Encourage the receiver to communicate where they are on the pleasure scale we’ve mentioned before.
  2. Breathe deeply and encourage your partner to follow your lead.
  3. As your partner edges towards the point of no return, slow down, ease up, or even pause to let them catch their breath.
  4. Edging is a skill to master over time, and you’ll learn it together.
  5. Stretching the testicles away from the body helps to ground the receiver back into their body.
  6. Experiment with all the strokes. Learn the strokes we’ve listed below to awaken your partner’s pleasure.

14. Aftercare

After any tantric massage or penis massage, aftercare is imperative.

The first is to give the recipient time to relax and integrate the experience.

A lingam massage is a very intense experience and can lead to an emotional response. Do your best to hold whatever comes up. Be vulnerable, soft, supportive, and caring.

Ask for what his needs and desires are. For example, if he seeks an add-on to the experience, you can also offer a prostate massage.

15. Make it a regular experience

For many couples, their first penis massage together shakes the relationship to the core — in the very best way!

However, most benefits come into play when this is made a regular shared experience. I recommend 1-2 times a month, and of course, the same for the yoni owner. Towards the end of the article, I’ll share how you can get your hands on the ultimate yoni massage guide.

16. Bonus massage

Testicle massage is an erotic massage that a man can explore by himself, or a partner can take the driver’s seat.

A scrotum massage opens up pleasure into an often-overlooked sensual powerhouse.

Some benefits include maintaining healthy testosterone levels, higher libido, and expanding sexual energy.

Here’s where to go for the ultimate guide to testicle massage, including a practical step-by-step guide and explainer video.


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What are the best Lingam massage techniques?

Here are my top 17 techniques for giving a sensational lingam massage. Practice each stroke for a minimum of 1-2 minutes to get into the swing of it.

Lingam massage techniques for the soft penis

Here are penis massage techniques for when it is not erect:

1. The Oil Move

oil move graphic

Slide your hands from the perineum all the way up to the lingam. Then, alternate your hands with a smooth stroke while spreading the oil.

2. The heart slide

heart slide graphic

Massage the lingam as it lies on his stomach. Stroke one hand from the root of his lingam up to his heart and circling back down. Alternate hands as the receiver experience the lingam-heart connection.

3. Rock around the clock

Rock around the clock graphic

Alternate both hands from the root to the tip of the lingam. You are moving it like a hand circling around the face of a clock. After one round, you can switch to a counter-clockwise direction.

4. Lingam shiatsu

Lingam shiatsu graphic

Starting at the root of the penis, press the lingam with your thumbs and index fingers. Press, hold, and release, incrementally climbing up the lingam slowly with both hands. Repeat from the shaft again once you reach the tip. Remember to apply this pressure to other sides of the lingam also.

5. The Rainmaker

The Rainmaker graphic

This is a great stroke to cool off. Lay the lingam on the belly, and patter tap the fingers tips from tip to the base like rain falling.

Lingam massage techniques for the erect penis

6. The healing stroke

 healing stroke graphic

Hold the lingam in both hands. The left-hand strokes up to the belly, and the other glides down to the testicles. Stay here, gently stretching the lingam before you repeat.

7. Rainbow rub

Rainbow rub graphic

One hand holds the root of the man’s penis, and the other palm circles the top, gland, and frenulum of the head.

8. The Bottle Opener

The Bottle Opener graphic

This powerful and arousing technique is also known as the screwdriver. First, wrap the thumb and index finger around the base of the shaft. Next, wrap the other around the head of his penis and use it to make a twisting motion in opposite directions as if you were uncorking a bottle of wine.

9. Prayer Position

Prayer Position graphic

Hold the hands in a prayer position, with the lingam in between. Then, move the hands up and down the penis and gently press them together to heighten this sexual experience.

10. Shaft Skiing

Shaft Skiing graphic

Hold the sides of the lingam with both hands. ‘Ski’ with alternating thumbs stroking from the root to the tip on the underside of the penis. First, left thumb and then right thumb. Enjoy playing with speed and pressure here.

11. Acupressure Stretch

Acupressure Stretch graphic

Clasp the center of the penis with the thumb and forefinger of both hands. Then begin to move hands in opposite directions experimenting with speeds, pressures, or even gently tug, if that feels good for him.

12. Snake charmer 

Snake charmer graphic

The thumb and index finger form a circle around the testes with one hand. Draw downward with gentle pressure. Wrap the other hand around the shaft, massaging the oil from the base of the penis to its tip.

13. The stroke

The stroke graphic

Wrap one hand around the base of the penis and move up to the tip — alternate hands and repeat 9 times. After the ninth time, repeat, but this time, move from tip to base. Next, move down to 8, then 7, etc. Find a rhythm that works for both of you.

14. Skyscraper

Skyscraper graphic

This is best for edging — so if you want to draw out his pleasure, save this for near the end. Begin by holding the lingam with your dominant hand and move your hand up and down. This builds excitement and familiarity, and it’s a similar sensation to being and thrusting inside the yoni. Since the intense stimulation, be careful to gradually increase the pleasure, not to tip him over to ejaculation.

Lingam massage techniques for the ending

Here are relaxing resting massage strokes for calming down the sexual energy. And for giving time for integration of the lingam massage and everything that might have come up during the session.

15. The pause

The pause graphic

Lay one soft hand on the lingam and the other cupped on the testicles. Hold still without any pressure. This is a great one if the receiver needs to cool down.

16. The man’s cave

lingam massage

Cup both hands around the lingam, like when you do Namaste, trying to touch as much skin as possible and hold still. Give gratitude.

17. Hold me

Hold me

Hold and squeeze the lingam tightly with both hands and intensify the pressure, communicating with the receiver that it’s still comfortable. This is a good finisher to ‘squeeze’ out the erection and sexual energy.

Yoni massage

Let the giver become the receiver through the art of the yoni massage

Of course, this deserves a whole article to itself — and here it is, your full guide to giving a yoni massage.

Conclusion: Lingam massage for more connection, spark, and pleasure

We’ve explored a lot here, from the benefits to the stages and steps of a lingam massage.

You’ll be able to create the perfect love nest, select the right massage oil, delve into connection practices with your love, and then adorn their body and lingam with your sensual touch.

Of course, you are also now well equipped with these tried and tested penis massage techniques that will light the fires of passion within your partner.

So if you’re reading this and want to give a lingam massage, give it a go!

If you’re reading this as a man seeking to enhance your lingam in a proven way, here is the natural penis enlargement course.

You’ll increase the size of your penis by 1-3 cm or half an inch to one inch in the next 90 days, guaranteed and safe. And train your cock-mind connection to get erections on command.


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Steffo Shambo

Steffo Shambo

Men's Tantric Relationship Coach

Steffo Shambo is the founder of The Tantric Man Experience. The #1 masculine mentorship program in the world, where he’s helping men master confidence, sexuality, & purpose to reignite the passion in their relationship or attract a meaningful relationship. He’s on a mission to spread a conscious sexual revolution for men worldwide so that they can show up as integrated partners, fathers, and leaders.

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