Tantra for Beginners: How to Practice Tantra as a Man

In this article, I'll distill my 1500 hours of certified tantra training into this ultimate guide to modern Tantra for beginners. After over a decade of daily tantra practice, studying with enlightening tantric gurus, and helping thousands of clients, I am honored to say I am a tantra expert.

Note that we will not be talking about traditional Tantra but rather neo-Tantra. You can find more info about classical Tantra in my other articles. If you're unsure what the difference is, read what Tantra is here.

You're likely reading this now because you've become aware of Tantra and want to know how to get started efficiently. Whether you wish to practice tantra by yourself or with a partner, this guide is for you!

What is Tantric Sex?

Tantric sexuality sees Life-force energy and pleasure as having the power to heal, transform, and induce altered states of consciousness. While many view sex as just connecting with a partner or chasing pleasure and dopamine, tantric practices add a spiritual dimension to relationships. Through tantric sex, people can reportedly reach transcendental states similar to psychedelic experiences and oneness with the divine. Sex becomes a portal for healing, overcoming trauma, self-realization, and experiencing universal consciousness. Rather than just an act of procreation or pleasure, tantric intimacy uses Life-force energy as a sacred tool for spiritual awakening and transformation.

What are the origins of tantric intimacy?

Many think Kama Sutra is the origin of tantric intimacy, but it's not! Tantric intimacy stems from the traditional Tantra lineages from India and Tibet. The word tantra (tæntrə) is Sanskrit (तन्त्र) and refers to techniques for expanding consciousness and recognizing the interconnectedness of all things. It aims to transcend the limitations of the individual self and achieve union with universal consciousness, known as Samadhi or enlightenment. Tantra emphasizes spiritual practices like meditation, visualization, breathwork, and rituals to cultivate energy. While often associated with sexuality in the West, Tantra encompasses all aspects of life holistically to find balance and harmony. This ancient, multifaceted system has evolved over thousands of years, with teachings that continue to guide spiritual seekers worldwide.

How do I start practicing Tantra?

The vastness of Tantra can be overwhelming for beginners. So, we'll focus here on beginning a Tantric practice with little to no experience in this lineage.

One of the most important first steps will be to find an experienced Tantra teacher to guide you.

It's important to research who you will trust to mentor you when learning how to practice Tantra. Follow your intuition to figure out where to learn Tantra. There's so much new-age fluff out there; I would personally not trust the vast majority of Tantra teachers. If your tantra teachers title themselves as "intergalactic shamanic womb healers," it might not be the most credible; I'm just saying. 😉

Make sure you find a lot of client testimonials, read their bio, their experience, and what gurus they have, and watch some of their videos to see if you resonate with their energy.

Once you’ve found a trusted teacher for your spiritual path, they will likely begin by teaching you the fundamentals of Tantra techniques for beginners. This may include solo practices like:

• Tension-releasing breathwork practices.
• Tantra meditation.
• Visualization practices.
• Tantra yoga sequences.
• Mantra repetition.

For a full breakdown of every major tantric practice and how to build them into a daily routine, see the tantric practices guide.

7 Solo Tantra Exercises For Beginners

Let's start with some tantra exercises you can do by yourself. Yes, it's possible to practice Tantra on your own. You don't even need to go to a workshop or an extended retreat. After this section, we'll discuss Tantric intimacy techniques with a partner.

1. Eye circles

1. Begin by lying on your back with your eyes open and relaxed, gazing at the sky or ceiling. Take in the details and find an even breath.
2. Next, keep your head still and look as far right as possible.
3. Look down to your feet.
4. Look as far left as you can.
5. Look as high up as you can.
6. Repeat the curricular movement of your eyes five times.
7. And then in the opposite direction.

Become aware of how much you can see at each point.

Notice if there was any increase in your field of vision.

2. Pelvic bouncing

Did you know that sucking in your belly can strain your lower back? Plus, when we worry about money and security, that tension can also end up in our lower backs.

But don't worry, we've got an exercise that can help loosen things up and awaken that powerful Kundalini snake at the base of your spine!

1. Find a soft, well-padded material, such as a yoga mat or carpet, and lie on your back with your arms by your sides and palms facing down.
2. Bring your feet comfortably close to your buttocks.
3.  Lift your hips off the ground, bouncing gently at first and increasing the intensity as you relax your buttocks, lower spine, and intimate parts. Just be careful not to hurt your lower back!

3. The Wave

Want to add a little extra spice to your next workout? This PC squeeze exercise is not only easy, but also a great way to move sexual energy around. So, let's get started!

1. First, stand with your feet hip-distance apart and slightly bend your knees.
2. Now, imagine you're an ocean wave. Swing your pelvis forward and let your torso follow.
3. As you lift your breastbone forward and up, your back will arch — this is the top of the wave.
4. Then, round your shoulders and your back, and swing your pelvis back.
5. Repeat this motion by swinging your pelvis forward and following through with the rest of your torso. Don't forget to incorporate PC squeezes as you move!

4. Chakra sounds

1. Sit or stand in a comfortable position with your spine straight.
2. Take a deep breath and start with a low "ooo" sound. Notice how the vibration of the sound resonates deeply in your lower abdomen and intimate parts.
3. Gradually increase the pitch and let out an "ohh" sound to feel the vibration in your solar plexus.
4. Keep changing the pitch until you feel the maximum vibration around your heart with an "ahh" sound.
5. Then, make a slightly higher-pitched "aay" sound, adjusting the pitch until you find the best vibration in your throat.
6. Finally, sing or chant "eee" at the highest pitch you can comfortably reach, feeling the vibration at the top of your head.

Each higher-pitched sound helps to move sexual energy up your body.

However, if you feel too much energy accumulating around your head, try making lower, more guttural sounds to pull it back down.

Alternate between sounds that activate different chakras, such as the first, fourth, and sixth chakras. These sounds not only build and distribute sexual energy but also release tension and pent-up emotions, allowing the energy to flow freely through your chakras.

4. Hip Circles

Let's add this fun and easy sequence to your Tantra practice!

1. Start by standing with your feet hip-distance apart, and get ready to move those hips!
2. First, swing your hips to the right as far as you comfortably can, ensuring not to strain your lower back.
3. Now, push your pelvis forward and feel that stretch. Swing your hips to the left and really feel those muscles working.
4. As you bring your hips back to the center, push your buttocks as far back as you can, being careful to take care of your back.
5. Connect those four points in a smooth circle, feeling the muscles in your hips and lower back activate. Keep it up and repeat a few times, and then switch directions and circle in the opposite way.

Not only is this exercise easy and effective, but it's also a great way to loosen up those hips, have a little fun, and connect to your sexual energy.

5. Tantric Breathing To Preserve Vital Energy

Tantric breathwork exercises are particularly beneficial for beginners, especially men. The rapid breath through the mouth changes the blood chemistry, and PubMed studies suggest it can help to last longer by easing the blood supply to the male sexual organ.

"The importance of yoga in the management of various sexual dysfunctions is increasingly recognized." - NCBI

1. Find a comfortable seated position with your back straight. You can sit cross-legged on the floor or in a chair with your feet firmly planted on the ground.
2. Take a few deep breaths to relax and prepare for the practice.
3. Begin by taking a deep inhale through both nostrils.
4. Exhale forcefully through the nose while contracting your abdominal muscles. This exhalation should be short and quick.
5. Immediately inhale again, and then exhale forcefully once more. Keep the rhythm of your breath steady and continuous, with each inhale and exhale being about the same length.
6. Focus on the exhalation, using your abdominal muscles to push out all the air from your lungs.
7. Continue the practice for 1-2 minutes or as long as you feel comfortable. You can gradually increase the duration of the practice over time.
8. After completing the practice, take a few deep breaths and then relax, observing any sensations or changes in your body.

It's important to note that Kapalabhati should be avoided by people with high blood pressure, heart disease, epilepsy, or any other medical condition that affects the respiratory system. If you feel lightheaded or dizzy while practicing Kapalabhati, stop immediately and return to your normal breathing.

6. The microcosmic orbit

1. Stand with your feet rooted into the floor.
2. Draw your awareness down to your perineum. Breathe in and pull energy to your tailbone. Next, raise it through your spine and neck, over the top of your head, and down your forehead to the roof of your mouth.
3. Touch your tongue to the roof of your mouth to connect the front and back energy channels.
4. Exhale and allow the energy to trickle down the front of your body, over your private areas, and back to your perineum.
5. Repeat — each time cocooning yourself in warm energy.

7. Tantric self-satisfaction practice

Intentional touching can be a powerful way to cultivate sexual energy. Instead, try exploring your body with curiosity and without judgment. Focus on the sensations you feel rather than trying to achieve orgasm.

1. Set aside time and create a sacred space to begin.
2. Explore! Let your hands graze all body parts and feel those nerve endings light up. Stay away from your lingam or yoni for as long as possible. Tease yourself.
3. Connect with the energetic body. Educate yourself on the body's chakra system and integrate this wisdom into your self-pleasure practice.
4. Remove goals — if you're a man, explore the benefits of vital energy retention.
5. Go wild —release moans and gasps. Rock your body and find your sensual self through this Tantra self-pleasure experience.

You can learn how to practice solo with tantric self-pleasure here.

Tantric self-satisfaction practice for couples

The techniques of self-satisfaction practice can also be incorporated with a partner. You can lie next to each other and practice tantric touching in synchronicity. What’s also extremely hot is taking turns in self-pleasure while the other person gets to watch and hold space.

This can be a very vulnerable yet worthwhile experience. You’ll feel the fibers of your relationship’s bond strengthen in the act. Plus, you learn your partner’s sexuality and how they like to be caressed.

Let’s explore this partnered practice even more with couples tantric techniques for beginners.

How do you practice tantric intimacy with a partner?

Practicing tantric sex with a partner is both a sensual and spiritual experience.

The goal of tantric lovemaking is to harness sexual energy for spiritual growth, deeper intimacy, and heightened pleasure.

Unlike conventional sex that aims for orgasm, tantric intimacy seeks to create a mind-body-spirit union and reach an expanded state of consciousness between partners.

A core principle of tantric sex is directing sexual energy toward spiritual transformation. Tantra emphasizes slowing down, being fully present in the moment, and building deep intimacy.

Tantric sex engages the entire body, not just the intimate parts. Partners deeply explore each other's bodies through conscious touch, eye contact, and emotional openness.

Some essential Tantric intimacy techniques for beginners are conscious self-pleasure and synchronized breathing. These can enhance sensual awareness, pleasure, and spiritual awakening between partners.

Here are the eight tantric practices for couples.

Let's get into the tantric exercises for couples:

1. Opening the Tantra ritual space

It all begins with the invitation.

You both need to let go of your everyday experiences. So take this time to slow down and enter into the tantric experience, allowing yourself to see all that is sacred and divine in your lover.

How to achieve hand balancing pose

1. Sit facing each other and begin with the man holding the back of his lover’s hands.
2. Settle into eye gazing for five minutes.
3. After this, swap the hand balance so the woman cradles the man’s hands. And breathe deeply into the moment for another five minutes.
4. This is best done naked so that you can begin to harmonize your energies together and strip away layers that are causing disconnection.

2. Tantric meditation: The yab yum pose

This meditation for couples is another option to create a deeper tantric connection for beginners.

In this tantric posture, we experience the union of feminine and masculine energies. One essential tantric practice is creating a sexual polarity between men and women and poses like yab yum help. It's also worth figuring out if your leading energy, whether man or woman, is more feminine or predominantly masculine.

-> Take this quiz to discover your leading energy.

Here are the steps to practice the Yab Yum position:

1. Find a comfortable seated position on the floor. The man begins by sitting cross-legged with a cushion or folded blanket to support his hips or sitting on his heels with a cushion between his feet.
2. Invite your partner to sit in your lap facing you. Wrap their legs around your waist, and their feet can rest on the floor or on your thighs.
3. Place your hands on your partner's lower back and invite them to rest their hands on your shoulders or around your neck.
4. Close your eyes and take a few deep breaths together, synchronizing your breath.
5. Focus on the energy exchange between you and your partner. Feel the connection between your root chakras, located at the base of your spine.
6. You can also visualize the flow of energy between your crown chakras, located at the top of your head.
7. Stay in this position for as long as you like, breathing deeply and feeling the energy exchange between you and your partner.

3. The Breath Energy Flow: Life-Force Activation

Breathwork is one of the most profound ways to awaken and circulate life-force energy throughout the entire body. This mindful, rhythmic breathing promotes a deep connection—both within yourself and with your partner—allowing energy to move freely and harmoniously.

The purpose of this practice isn’t physical release but the expansion of awareness. Through conscious breathing and presence, you can tune into subtle sensations, experience unity between body and spirit, and open to a higher state of consciousness.

Instead of striving for one explosive moment, the experience becomes a flow of waves—patterns of energy rising and falling—each wave deepening your sense of peace, intimacy, and connection. These waves, sometimes referred to as energy orgasms, engage the whole being rather than focusing on a single physical point, transforming ordinary sensation into a meditative, blissful state of union.

With continued practice, this gentle, full-body awareness nurtures emotional openness and shared presence, honoring both partners in a balanced exchange of life-force energy and conscious love.

4. Conscious Polarity Play

Exploring contrasts such as intensity and surrender within a tantric context can be a deeply transformative practice. When approached with mindfulness, communication, and emotional awareness, it offers a path toward deeper trust and connection between partners.

Begin with an open conversation about boundaries, preferences, and intentions. Establish a safety word or signal to ensure both partners feel secure and respected throughout the experience.

The partner receiving an experience can express their desires or the kind of sensations they would like to explore—focusing on emotional release, grounding, or energetic awakening rather than physical challenge. The giving partner consciously agrees only to what feels aligned for both. The aim is not physical dominance but an exchange of awareness, breath, and intuition.

Move slowly, maintaining presence and connection through breath and eye contact. Notice how different levels of intensity awaken energy within the body and heart. Continue to communicate—adjust, pause, or shift when necessary to stay connected and centered.

Afterward, set aside time to reflect together. Share what sensations, emotions, or insights arose. Ask what felt empowering or healing and what could be explored differently next time.

This mindful exploration of intensity, based on trust and clear communication, allows couples to experience the dance between strength and vulnerability while staying rooted in love, authenticity, and spiritual awareness.

5. Energy orgasm during tantric sex

In the world of tantric sexuality, the energy orgasm is a high-octane sexual pleasure experience. One that deepens both partners' spiritual practice. Here’s how to achieve an energy orgasm.

1. Begin in couples meditation — sit in yab-yum and spend time in breathwork together.
2. When you’re ready, begin to connect — kiss, whisper, caress your partner’s body. Let the foreplay be intense, passionate, and conscious.
3. When you’re making love in a tantric way, the pose doesn't matter. Tantric lovemaking can occur in any position. Focus your attention on the present moment — forget about the goals.
4. Then, you'll start to move all that energy up the spine and into the brain. Feel the electricity running through your body.
5. Savor the feelings of euphoria, expanded consciousness, and union, as you spread the energy throughout the whole body.

7. Conscious quickies

These are moments in a relationship to incorporate better quality time. Many couples yearn for deeper connection and believe it's because they don't spend enough time together.

The truth is that from a tantric perspective, it's far more about the intention behind the time spent together than the quantity of time spent together.

Here are some examples of conscious quickies — take twenty minutes to ramp up your love life by:

• Create a sensual dance rituals for your partner by lighting candles and playing soft music
• Use blindfolds, candles, playful talk, and feathers
• Relax into a couple's puja ritual to honor their divine energy

8. Tantric massage for couples (lingam and yoni massage)

Open up new possibilities of intimate connection with a tantric couples massage.

Fortunately, we have two comprehensive guides to give your lover an incredibly erotic experience. Here’s the tantric lingam massage guide you need for your male partner and a yoni massage if you want to douse your woman with pleasure.

Before diving into these fountains of knowledge, the most significant pillars of couples tantric massage for beginners are presence and time. Give it a go, and your tantric relationship will never be the same!

Where to learn Tantra online? (Free online tantra course)

By now, you should have an introductory knowledge of Tantra yoga for beginners. We've explored Tantric intimacy techniques, breathwork, visualizations, and more. You've likely gathered by now that Tantra is a vast spiritual science with tools to transform your life.

To dive deeper, here is my free online tantra course, which you can watch immediately to reignite the spark in your relationship or attract a life partner. 

Frequently Asked Questions About Tantra for Beginners